Sunday, May 01, 2005

Special Guest Appearance by God

Posted by Box Daddy

Direct by satellite transmission from the Big H:

William "The Refrigerator" Perry, Lynn "Cry Baby" Swann, and Davy "Rebel Yell" Gelernter all need to learn a litttle lesson in humility. The Dynamic Duo of Billy "White Shoes" Johnson and Box Daddy have been going easy on them as far as I can tell.

Trust me, their "points" are way off base. Here's why:

The Fridge writes:

"As a scholar with expertise in the history of Western civilization [NOTE: as God Himself, I am deeply unimpressed by your credentials sir], I can tell you authoritatively that the overiding theme of this history is the attempt to balance personal freedom and individual responsibility on the one hand with the public interest on the other hand. Gelernter obviously errs too much on the side of advocating for personal freedom. Box Daddy errs too much on the side of surrendering these freedoms. The answer that is in everyone's best interest is obviously somewhere in between the two extremes. This should be obvious from both history and common sense."

As is usually true, the supposedly "obvious" merely hides a deeply flawed worldview.

At one point in time, it was "obvious" that women did not deserve to vote. Earlier, it was also once "obvious" that the crucial need of mankind was to appease various gods through ritual sacrifices. Just because something appears to be "obvious" does not make it the least bit true.

Quoth The Fridge:

"I can tell you authoritatively that the overiding theme of this history is the attempt to balance personal freedom and individual responsibility on the one hand with the public interest on the other hand...The answer that is in everyone's best interest is obviously somewhere in between the two extremes. This should be obvious from both history and common sense."

Unfortunately, the Fridge's "common sense approach" is insufficient.

Here's why:

Human beings are vain. If something does not take place within their own life times then they tend to think that it has "failed." Today, Communism is just such an idea.

Communism is probably a five hundred year project that will lead to the whole earth sharing in the wealth of the land.

Every successful social movement has gone through difficult trials and the more popular the movement, the more difficult the trials. The fact that dictators and lunatics appropriated communist rhetoric to be loony and dictatorial is not surprising. Dictatorial people always employ ideas that are attractive to people in order to gain their assent: can we say "compassionate conservative"?

What is very surprising, however, is that Communism remains extremely popular throughout the third world as a secular philosophy of communal progress. That is, among the 6 billion people on earth, I would guess that an easy billion and a half, if not two billion would choose communism in a free and fair global election.

Why?

Because most people around the globe -- in the slums of Lagos, the workers' shacks outside Shanghai, in the barrios of East LA and the favelas of Sao Paulo do not have a lot of time to contemplate ideas like "personal freedom" and "individual responsibility."

These are concepts that are only truly meaningful to middle class first world people who imagine life as essentially a trip to the mall: I want to buy anything I like, but I should probably be restricted from purchasing anything that will harm other people (Personal responsibility vs. public interest).

On the other hand, for the two billion strong global lumpenproletariat who lives on two dollars a day, the main issue is finding a way to survive and provide their families with a bare minimum of sustenance.

Box Daddy supports a political system that addresses these people's needs before all others.

As a result, the Box Daddy solution is global communism.

That is, a political system that is geared towards providing the maximum number of people with the opportunity to become educated, well fed and healthy on a peaceful planet. Capitalism is fundamentally opposed to these priorities. Therefore, the proper first step toward global communism entails the dismantling of capitalism in favor of new systems dedicated to altering the living standards of the poorest citizens of the world.

Such approaches will logically entail drastically reducing the availability of consumer goods in the first world (through expropriation and reorganization), while creating a merit-based structure to design efficient ways to produce and deliver energy, food, clothing, health care, education, and culture for the global citizenry of the planet.

Communism is the only system that places the needs of the weak and abused before the whims of the powerful and well-fed.

I mean Capitalism won the Cold War fifteen years ago and already it has plunged the planet into a state of perpetual, lawless global war. It is failing before our eyes. Workers of the World Unite!

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